How Teacher Calls Home Should Sound

by Guy E. White on 8 October, 2014

Teachers often fall into traps that damage relationships with parents.

One of my first calls home to a student’s parent was a complete disaster. By the end of the call, everyone was angry. I thought I was going to have a strong ally – instead, I became parent enemy number one.

Calling a student’s home is a plunge into the unknown. There could be anything waiting for you at the other end of that phone. It’s always important to be prepared before you make the call.

In my experience through many years of teaching, and through numerous conversations with teachers throughout the world, here’s the basic “dos” when making that perilous call to a student’s parent:

1. Just the Facts Ma’am

Avoid making judgments about the student’s ability, performance, or character. Provide data and let the parents make the connection when possible. For example, instead of saying that Johnny is a menace, simply state that he can usually be observed talking with other students during work time. Provide grades, percentages, counts (“she has done 2 out of 20 assignments), and observations. With these data points, parents will often make the connection that you want them to make: they will take action on your behalf.

2. Give a Sandwich

No parent enjoys the conversation where a relative stranger is bashing his or her kid. So, provide some observations about the student that are not negative in nature. For example, you can say that a student is outgoing, daring, not quick-to-anger, among a host of other options. Then, provide the facts that are causing you to call. After, finish by providing some more observations. Best case, you provide positive-concern-positive.

3. Share Your Hopes

You and a student’s parents already share a common goal: the success of the student. So, make sure that you mention that you want this student to succeed and that you will be excited for them to (1) successfully complete the class and move up a grade, or (2) graduate. Focus on the hope to connect you and the parent to that goal that unifies you.

4. Make an Offer

Give the student the option to make up work, take/retake a test, or to have one-on-one help with you. Even if you truly believe that the student won’t do this, tell the parent that you are willing to provide such accommodations. You may be surprised at how disarming making such an offer can be. Parents will see your willingness to assist their children.

5. Focus on Solutions

The purpose of your call is, in the end, to allow the student to make a change and solve the problems relating to the classroom. So, stay focused on brainstorming with the parent some solutions about what could help his or her student. When the focus is on solutions it provides a way forward, whereas focusing on problems closes down the conversation.

How do you ensure such calls are beneficial for all involved? What would you put on your own list?

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